Tufte Would be Proud

JA

Always look on the bright side of life

DOT: Dangerous Intersection Causing Some Pretty Cool Accidents

DDR: Let the Carnage Commence

Dance Dance Revolution? More like Dance Dance Junta.

Now calling all able-bodied DUSPers for the inaugural DDR DUSP Team. Email me with your stats and we'll send you the date and time of the first practice. Hope you're doing your jumping jacks, Center for Real Estate.

Bring your sweatbands!

shar

More than a Citgo

Brush up on your Boston geography:

http://www.thephoenix.com/PrinterFriendly.aspx?id=16820

"Here, smack in the middle of Copley Square, is a tunnel, above which hangs a sign emblazoned with the destination NEW YORK. Boston has always seemed to have a certain inferiority complex when it comes to our neighbor to the south. But right in the middle of our own city, we have what looks to be an escape hatch, leading straight to that more urbane metropolis, lest the Hub ever get too provincial."

New Major Offered at MIT: Course 69

Cambridge, MA - Early Sunday morning, a group of lonely female graduate students at MIT's Department of Urban Planning announced the launch of an exciting new major: Course 69 where students of any race, gender, and sexual orientation can learn about relationship, dating, and sex do's and don'ts. In the era of globalization, the male students at MIT, in particular, must learn to be competitive with international male gigalo. For example, did you know going dutch on the first date decreases the likelihood that she will let you touch her had you just paid for dinner. Course 69 syllabus will be available in a Common Room nearest you.

Woo! We're number 4!

America's drunkest cities, according to Forbes.com

http://www.forbes.com/entrepreneurs/2006/08/22/nightlife-cities-drunk_cx_de_nightlife06_0822intro.html

Boston pulls in at number 4, while Milwaukee takes top honors.

Ask the local gentry, and they will say it's elementary.

Sometimes I Feel Like I'm The Only One Trying To Gentrify This Neighborhood

When I moved into this neighborhood, I fell in love right away. Not with the actual neighborhood, but with its potential: It's affordable, there...

The Revolution Will Not Be Televised

Hope DUSPERs are having an awesome summer. I know I am.

xoxo,
y

MIT Researchers Discover Each Other

January 12, 2005 Issue 41•02 (The Onion)

CAMBRIDGE, MA–While attempting to isolate a gene believed to be key to the development of the autoimmune disorder myasthenia gravis Monday, MIT geneticists Dr. Stephen Burch and Dr. Caryn Song made a breakthrough discovery: each other. "I was examining some cellular tissue when my electron microscope broke," Burch said. "Caryn offered to share her microscope, and each of us looked at the tissue through one of the eyepieces. At one point, our cheeks lightly touched, and I looked over and realized how beautiful she looks without her glasses. I always saw Caryn as a respected colleague. For the first time, I saw her as a woman." A process of trial-and-error sexual experimentation commenced later that evening, continuing well into the night.

The future of democracy?

Be My Voter

By TRACY SAMANTHA SCHMIDT

In the '90s, the message was "Rock the Vote." Now it's time to "Facebook" it. Starting in September, politicians will be able to buy ad space on networking site Facebook.com allowing them to create profiles viewable to 8 million members. That should help pols court a group of voters who are hard to reach. Facebookers will be able to "friend" any candidate they like--linking to a profile as they would a classmate's. Facebook says politicians won't pay anything near the tens of thousands of dollars that corporate advertisers do to set up on the site. Politicians should log on, says Markos Moulitsas of the Daily Kos politiblog, because young people "hang out in places like ... Facebook and MySpace," which plans a similar initiative. They're the new town square--great for any candidate who can figure out the online equivalent of a handshake.

From the Jul 17, 2006 issue of TIME magazine

rename Cambridge

http://www.ikatun.com/institute/rename/

pony up to get to rename every piece of cambridge. MIT => ???

z

57 free things to do in harvard square

next time you want to fool around and don't want to blow any doh. here's some inspiration from some great performance art vids.

http://www.ikatun.com/57/

Have a drink, the world is nearly 50% urban

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/science/nature/5054052.stm

"North America and Europe's urban areas already account for about 70-80% of the regions' populations, and these are expected to stabilise at these levels.

Developing nations are shouldering the vast majority of this burden, leaving them struggling to cope with the huge influx of people into urban areas. Some cities' populations are 40 times larger than what they were in 1950."

Half the world lives in cities... is there some way we can work that into a t-shirt?

Halliburton Solves Global Warming.

I knew they could do it. In yo' faces, haters!

http://www.halliburtoncontracts.com/EPDU/

-alexis.

NIPC Wins "Planning Award for a Plan"

Outstanding Planning Award for a Plan
2040 Regional Framework Plan (Northeastern Illinois Planning Commission)
A new vision, articulated in the 2040 Regional Framework Plan developed by the Northeastern Illinois Planning Commission, is helping to guide decision making in a six-county, three-state region. The vision seeks to accommodate anticipated growth in an efficient, coordinated, and sustainable manner. Use of current technology was instrumental in developing the plan, including instant polling, which helped gauge the level of agreement on various issues, and "Paint the Region," a software program that allowed participants to map their desired future.

City Councilman Unearths Magical Zoning Amulet

ROCHESTER, NY—After years spent poring over mysterious and arcane plat sheets and deciphering long-forgotten building codes, city councilmember Mike LaMere unearthed the mysterious City Zoning Amulet Friday. Mike LaMere, wearing the Ever-Evaluating Eye of Surr-Vey.

"Behold!" LaMere said, holding aloft the solid-gold amulet, which is emblazoned with the Ever-Evaluating Eye of Surr-Vey, Lord Of Demarcation, He Who Measures And Assesses. "With this sigil, the power of zoning comes. Through me, the power of zoning flows! All will behold my power, and I shall bow to no man when designating matter-of-right developments for major retail and office spaces to a maximum lot occupancy of 75 percent for residential use!"

LaMere held the glowing amulet aloft and transmuted a neighborhood of low-income apartments into a semi-wooded, single-family, residential district with an adjoining riverside park.

Though the amulet had long been dismissed as urban legend, a mythical ideal of zoning perfection handed down from city planner to city planner, LaMere became convinced that not only was it real, but that it had been used to lay out the cities of Ur, Atlantis, and Inver Grove Heights, MN.

LaMere credited the amulet with the overnight renovation of the Monroe County Public Library, and the recent redesignation of a Southern Rochester area from "commercial" to "single-family residential use for detached and semi-detached structures." Many Rochester citizens believe the amulet is responsible for the fully stocked ocean aquarium that materialized in the city center Sunday, and the gleaming new Friendly's restaurant that rose serenely over the banks of the Genesee River late Monday afternoon.

Although the Rochester City Zoning Board controls all decisions related to city planning, sources at City Hall say that, as long as LaMere's powerful zoning wizardry is performed for the good of the city, they "see no reason to deny him what seems to be his destiny."

LaMere unleashes the Eye of Surr-Vey's power, violently rezoning a residential area into a landfill.

"Two weeks ago, the biggest news in Rochester was our huge public garage sale," said William A. Johnson, Rochester's mayor. "Our city center was still a moribund tax burden with small businesses in big buildings and families moving to the suburbs in droves. Now, with a wave of his mighty amulet, Councilman LaMere can designate matter-of-right medium-density development, with limited offices for non-profit organizations, trade associations, and professionals permitted as a special exception requiring approval of the RCZA."

Despite the potential improvements to Rochester's civic landscape, some residents remain wary of LaMere's apparent bureaucratic invincibility.

"It's wonderful that someone's finally doing something to revitalize this town, even if it is someone who can commune with church gargoyles," said local baker Wendy Kittner, whose business was mystically placed on the National Register Of Historic Places last week despite being housed in a building erected in 1981. "He frightens me, and my concern is that if I defy him, I may be turned to stone."

City planning commissioner Errol Criclow, who was dismissed by LaMere at a Planning And Zoning Commission hearing last Thursday as "subhuman," said that he feared that LaMere's power would eventually corrupt him and his city. According to Criclow, during a private consultation with local community leaders, LaMere became infuriated with timid suggestions that his amulet be used to create more green spaces. In a blinding torrent of thunder and light, LaMere violently rezoned Rochester's west side with a maze of warehouses and parking garages. The act left LaMere himself dazed and shaken.

"For a minute there, he seemed his old self," said Criclow. "When he saw what he'd done, he looked remorseful. But then his hand found the amulet, and he threw back his head and laughed long and loud, like a man who has forgotten the difference between industrial and recreational—between right and wrong."

Added Criclow: "I don't think what he's doing is mere magic. I think it's darkest bureaucromancy."

Urban Planner Stuck in Traffic of Own Design

PITTSBURGH, PA—Bernard Rothstein, an urban planner and traffic-flow modulation specialist with the Urban Redevelopment Authority, found himself stuck in rush-hour traffic of his own design for more than an hour Monday. Rothstein contemplates traffic-flow problems.

"This happens every weeknight," Rothstein said, inching through the Allegheny Center district he designed in 1987. "When will I learn to avoid this part of town during rush hour?"

The gridlock-bound Rothstein, who has worked in urban planning for 24 years, passed the time by devising possible modifications to his original design.

"A direct path to I-279 and wider on-ramps would have helped, for starters," Rothstein said, drumming his fingers on the steering wheel. "Sure, a six-lane street wouldn't look as nice as that tree-lined square with the fountain—Jesus, lady! Move!—but with six lanes, I wouldn't be sitting here breathing fumes."

While attempting to nose his Lexus GS 300 into a line of honking cars, Rothstein brainstormed more solutions to his current predicament.

"With more lanes, tourists wouldn't have to cut across commuter traffic to get from the area around the Buhl Planetarium and the Institute Of Popular Science down to the Three Rivers area to buy hot wings at those crappy jazz clubs," Rothstein said. "You might have thought of that, genius. After all, you're the one who convinced them to re-zone it commercial. Moron."

Added Rothstein: "Who wants a shopping area in—move your ass, blue Taurus! Come on! Who wants a shopping area in an access-limited waterway confluence, anyway? Oh, yeah: the genius Bernie Rothstein!"

As Pittsburgh, America's steel capital, made the transition to high-tech and service industries in the 1980s, many thought its rusting, blighted urban landscape was obsolete. According to Rothstein, it was then that the Urban Redevelopment Authority, along with several private urban-planning firms, began the slow process of rethinking the city's roads, parks, and commercial and residential districts. Today, the city's designers are regularly lauded for their elegant, modern buildings and stuck in traffic of their own making for hours at a time.

Abandoning his plan to get on the interstate with a hasty U-turn, Rothstein explained that he was also part of the eight-person team that created Crawford Square, an 18-acre residential development on the eastern edge of downtown Pittsburgh.

"Crawford Square is a pedestrian-oriented neighborhood with a large public recreation center, a three-mile jogging trail, and residents with a wide range of incomes," Rothstein said. "Green space is great. It felt wonderful to turn four defunct foundries into a park-lined community with access to downtown. Would've been even better to turn it into a community lined with, say, 85 percent of the existing parkland and a few more goddamned dedicated turn lanes."

Hastily executing two left turns to re-enter the interstate on-ramp, Rothstein described the Three Rivers traffic hub. He said he considers the hub—with its long, flowing, elevated contours and broad, boulevard-lined access ways—an aesthetic triumph, as well as "a complete bitch to navigate."

"Medium-interval on-ramp traffic lights, my ass," Rothstein said. "Very nice sweeping compound curves on the bridge thoroughfares, Bernie. They're very fluid—unlike the traffic stuck in them right now."

Rolling down a window and shaking a fist at the traffic ahead, Rothstein said: "This is about that Route 28 thing, isn't it, God? If I promise to put in more HOV concessions, will you please get things moving here already?"

A cell-phone call from Rothstein's wife Marjorie interrupted the angry tirade.

"Well, I'm sorry it's taking so long, Bernie," Marjorie said. "But remember, honey, that you're the one who said I-279 was a horrible scar gouged into the city for the sake of efficiency. It was your own enthusiasm for small, two- to eight-acre city parks that made Pittsburgh a nicer place to live and got you into this mess."

Commentary on MIT Planning?

"I'm more of an integration-minded postmodernist. I don't believe that form should follow function, like most of my colleagues do. On the other hand, a dam is a celebration of beaver culture, and that is what it should reflect."

http://www.theonion.com/content/node/47469

Town for sale!

"The owner, businessman Bruce Krall, is hoping for a minimum bid of $1.75m (£1m) for a town he admits does not even have one horse.

The price does, however, include three cows, eight houses, and a post office.

Mr Krall says he no longer has time to spend in Bridgeville (population: about 20) but he says the town offers the 'opportunity of a lifetime'."

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/americas/4875206.stm

fat kid vid

this is just what we have to look forward to.

-tim

Announcing First Annual DDR (Dance Dance Revolution) Battle!

What: Team DUSP tryouts for DDR Battle
When: Thursday Mar 16, 2006 7pm sharp
Where: Student center arcades
Who: DUSPers with demonstrated athletic ability and/or mad mojo
Why: Because currently MIT freshmen are kicking our asses

Competition Schedule
team DUSP vs. team ARCHITECTURE
team DUSP vs. team Center for Advanced Visual Studies
team DUSP vs. team Media Lab
team DUSP vs. team Political Science

Team DUSP season record as of Mar 2006: 1-0

(This is totally serious peoples. A documentary filmmaker will be chronicling the trials and tribulations of team DUSP's battle for the DDR championship title. Stay tuned. -y)

Abandoned Municipal Projects

Courtesy of The Onion.

Just in time for Valentine's

Fellow planners, Mr. Leon "Chris L." Phelps. Yes, that is Covoisier in his hand.


J

Graz sports stadium gets 'terminated'

Old news, but still funny.

"Mr Schwarzenegger demanded that Graz stop using his name for a sports stadium and sent back a "ring of honour" bestowed on him in 1999."

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/europe/4544798.stm

New Year New Jersey New Slogan

New Jersey: Land without sarcasm

Thu Dec 22, 8:34 AM ET

PHILADELPHIA (Reuters) - New Jersey, trying to overcome its reputation for corruption, traffic and toxic waste dumps, has rejected dozens of sardonic and sarcastic entries in a contest for a new tourist slogan.

A list of five possible slogans released on Wednesday leaves out "New Jersey: We can always use another relative on the payroll," and "Come to New Jersey: It's not as bad as it smells."

Voters get to pick the winner in the competition launched after Gov. Richard Codey nixed "New Jersey: We'll Win You Over," created by a consultant who was paid $260,000.

"It makes me think of when I was young and single and asked a girl out," Codey said in a statement. "She turned me down. I said, 'Give me a chance, I'll win you over.'"

Nearly 7,800 entries were submitted to promote a state not widely known for its pristine countryside and sun-soaked beaches.

The five finalists are: "New Jersey: Expect the Unexpected," "New Jersey: Love at First Sight," "New Jersey: Come See for Yourself," "New Jersey: The Real Deal" and "New Jersey: The Best Kept Secret."

Voters in the Garden State have until January 1 to make their selection.


i heart exit 9
y